I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
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