I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
