you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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