I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
