I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
