Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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