Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize