hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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