kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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