why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
