JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to summon your inner elephant
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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