her vagina looked like bernie madoff
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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