I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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