Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Found your dick twin last night
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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