i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
