it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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