I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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