if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Even my vagina gasped.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
