That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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