No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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