Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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