It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
we're so committed to being not committed
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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