Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
