this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Your penis caused this!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
