i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
