i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
