At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
