xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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