My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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