We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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