Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
be right there i have to get my cape
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
