dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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