How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
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