White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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