I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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