He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
handjob tips. give me some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize