I just threw up on my dentist
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm passing your future prison.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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