good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
