My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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