piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
