I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
All the doctor said was why
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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