just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
