How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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