her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
