just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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