Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
false alarm, still single
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