Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
