on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
