You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
