There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Semen is not good for contacts.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
